Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(407): View more from Florida

I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."

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(785): View more from Kansas

if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.

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(305): View more from Florida

gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill

(970): View more from Colorado

did you ask her what wine to pair it with?

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Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(631): View more from New York

i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.

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(517): View more from Michigan

the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.

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(949): View more from California

I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.

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(301): View more from Maryland

My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?

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