Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
