Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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