Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I love having hate sex.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
