Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize