You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize