girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
