so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
