btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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