If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize