You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
