Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(353): View more from

i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash

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(970): View more from Colorado

Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober

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(314): View more from Missouri

i don't want you to think of me as your TA

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(905): View more from Ontario

Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.

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(703): View more from Virginia

he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh

(1-703): View more from Virginia

be sure to add "office slut" to your resume

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(562): View more from California

I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.

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(302): View more from Delaware

You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.

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