this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
