Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
