So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
