The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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