i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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