did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
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i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
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Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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