Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
