Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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