Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize