Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
