but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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