your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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