we have pet lesbian snakes
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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