I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
As shirtless as possible
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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