What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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