I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"