Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
