ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
it was like eating out sand paper
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
