Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
You are a genius and a whore.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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