Got a toothbrush?
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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