I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize