that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Fuck appropriateness.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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