So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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