Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.

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(803): I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide. http://tfl.nu/8cjy

Replies (8) Good night (797) Bad night (1273)
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(206): View more from Washington

Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.

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(206): Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable. http://tfl.nu/didw

Replies (3) Good night (671) Bad night (2040)
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(319): View more from Iowa

By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"

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(319): By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection" http://tfl.nu/gcjm

Replies (14) Good night (5437) Bad night (1269)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.

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(413): He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m. http://tfl.nu/2wu4

Replies (24) Good night (1430) Bad night (5101)
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(705): View more from Ontario

She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.

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(705): She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air. http://tfl.nu/d5pp

Replies (10) Good night (4593) Bad night (900)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.

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(337): There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back. http://tfl.nu/dznq

Replies (6) Good night (4756) Bad night (1349)
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(347): View more from New York

when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign

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(347): when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign http://tfl.nu/d21d

Replies (22) Good night (2971) Bad night (1579)
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(563): View more from Iowa

I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.

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(563): I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it. http://tfl.nu/ttul

Replies (33) Good night (1247) Bad night (3078)
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(760): View more from California

The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation

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(760): The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation http://tfl.nu/2mmn

Replies (9) Good night (1949) Bad night (1425)
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(330): View more from Ohio

It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.

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(330): It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this. http://tfl.nu/6tb8

Replies (4) Good night (545) Bad night (1247)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

I remember it like it was tomorrow.

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(860): Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love (1-860): I remember it like it was tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1n7o

Replies (2) Good night (2358) Bad night (644)
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(325): View more from Texas

So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.

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(325): So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it. http://tfl.nu/zi6y

Replies (6) Good night (1284) Bad night (517)
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(847): View more from Illinois

You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts

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(847): You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts http://tfl.nu/dzv1

Replies (5) Good night (563) Bad night (985)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.

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(502): Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie. http://tfl.nu/p8oo

Replies (4) Good night (584) Bad night (353)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.

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(919): He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal. http://tfl.nu/fw4t

Replies (3) Good night (389) Bad night (292)

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