Texts From Last Night

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  (904): View more from Florida

  I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...

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  (904): I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem... http://tfl.nu/1w4y
  Replies (43) Good night (5654) Bad night (869)
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  (951): View more from California

  so let's talk penis.

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  (951): so let's talk penis. http://tfl.nu/oygv
  Replies (16) Good night (4596) Bad night (749)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him

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  (215): some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him http://tfl.nu/gsvg
  Replies (7) Good night (6100) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.

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  (772): The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle. http://tfl.nu/irdh
  Replies (12) Good night (4049) Bad night (1510)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.

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  (678): He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going. http://tfl.nu/db5s
  Replies (20) Good night (4757) Bad night (1104)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?

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  (570): I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to? http://tfl.nu/dwjv
  Replies (3) Good night (1112) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.

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  (519): She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot. http://tfl.nu/3yos
  Replies (18) Good night (1905) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND

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  (215): OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND http://tfl.nu/fivf
  Replies (23) Good night (1830) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one

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  (615): The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one http://tfl.nu/1h27
  Replies (3) Good night (1687) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  You're so romantic.

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  (406): I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you. (1-406): You're so romantic. http://tfl.nu/mrz2
  Replies (2) Good night (1132) Bad night (438)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.

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  (813): Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick. http://tfl.nu/1ytv
  Replies (7) Good night (1508) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  soon, soon....

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....

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  (732): soon, soon.... (908): I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus..... http://tfl.nu/hpc3
  Replies (4) Good night (939) Bad night (605)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home

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  (415): We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home http://tfl.nu/a6an
  Replies (1) Good night (779) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?

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  (317): I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened? http://tfl.nu/0nes
  Replies (2) Good night (284) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  Omg so it's educational?

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  (802): There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking (1-802): Omg so it's educational? http://tfl.nu/zo1h
  Replies (2) Good night (710) Bad night (280)

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