like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
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i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
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I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize