sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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