I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
