we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
