he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
