Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize