Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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