What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
cat food counts as protein by the way
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
