And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize