I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize