Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize