But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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