You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
