The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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