I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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